Please join us in welcoming our newest associate, Erica M. Cannata, LADC, MFT, CCDP-D, to Marriage & Family Therapy of Trumbull (MFT3).

Erica joins both Katherine Allen, M.A., LMFT and Laura Petiford, M.A., LMFT at the Trumbull location. Erica, a seasoned expert in addiction disorders and adolescent issues, is a Licensed Addiction Counselor and Certified Co-Occurring Disorders Professional Diplomate in the state of Connecticut. Erica will begin taking new clients starting June 28, 2010.

At MFT3 we understand that life can come at you fast, and that’s why we’re here to help. MFT3 can be found online at http://www.mft3.com. Visit our blog at http://blog.mft3.com or join the Facebook page at http://www.facebook.com/mft3page.

Our office location is at 2 Corporate Drive, Suite 211, Trumbull CT 06611. Phone: 203-416-6008. E-mail: info@mft3.com.

Wishing one and all balance and peace.

Watch this 36-minute movie and rethink your ROI on your daily grind and see if a change may be for the better for you as well. 36 minutes may be all that is standing in the way of your true happiness.

Having gone through this particular ringer, as well as years of business experience, MFT3 is well suited to be a source of support should you be ready to make some lemonade of your own.

Take a look at the end of the interview here:

Scroll in to 2:00 to see the part I am referring to. It is apparent to me, a trained clinician with depth of experience in DV, to see Ms. Richards body language shifting. I know that Oprah would never call herself a clinician, she is an entertainer, but that is exactly why I found this so poignant. Ms. Richards is obviously terribly uncomfortable. Oprah is looking to have a thorough interview, she is not trained to see that, perhaps, the alleged escalation of Mr. Sheen’s behavior has triggered something in Ms. Richards, she looks at her father in the front row for support, yet Oprah continues to ask for a better answer to her question.

What I do not believe most people understand is that DV therapy is a very slow, very gentle, very different kind of therapy than most other therapy. The therapist does not want to re-victimize the client by unwittingly continuing the stance of power and control that the perpetrator has established. A survivor may not have been the victim of physical abuse, but if a perpetrator does not seek professional assistance in changing their behavior, the pattern is always one of escalation, and allegedly, this is exactly what has happened with Mr. Sheen. Therefore, it makes perfect sense that Ms. Richards is going to shut herself down a little, have to reinforce her skills and seek safety in her answers on National TV, because she does have to be in his presence again. Oprah and we the viewers, we do not.

So my heart went out to Ms. Richards when Oprah, I believe, unwittingly assumed the role of power and control by calling her on not answering the last question, even in light of Ms. Richards looking at her father, seeking safety and support from him, yet again being pressed to do something against her will.

Domestic violence is so much more than a broken arm or an attack with a knife. Typically, many months or years of emotional, financial, verbal, psychological and even sexual abuse have taken place before the cycle is raised to a physical level. But it is a pattern of increasing escalation, no matter who the perpetrator and victim may be, famous or not, rich or poor. I see a four year battle in court to be nothing more than a continuation of the DV Mr. Sheen may have allegedly been perpetrating on Ms. Richards. What better way to ensure that she be where he wants her to be and on his terms?

I found Ms. Richards to be very brave. I completely understand her reluctance to answer questions she is not comfortable answering. I hope she continues to trust and listen to herself and not bow to others.

Happiness, at the core, is a state of mind, a choice, and the debate ensues regarding money and its effect. I fall into the camp of belief that money is only associated to happiness based on the degree of comfort in one’s surroundings that it can create, not that it inherently causes happiness in and of itself (picture curling up in front of a fire with stacks of $20s).

But what about serious depression? I mean, if Chevy Chase, who has lots and lots of money, has trouble finding the correct anti-depressant for 6 years, what does that say about money’s role and strength regarding happiness?

In the end, it is the quality of our relationships that influences happiness, which so perfectly brings us circling back to episode 1, and so it goes.

Be prepared for MFT3 to refer to this series often regarding the multitude of topics that were so beautifully illustrated by PBS. I hope you were as moved by it as I was.

The thing that this episode, “Facing Our Fears” so poignantly expresses is that we all do have all of these feelings, but what to do when they become unmanageable? And what does unmanageable look like, really?

As a therapist I am proud of PBS for being so thorough and explicit, going to the tough place and shedding light into some commonly dark corners. I will be using these episodes as resources for current and future clients as a launching pad for conversations about grief, trauma, depression, fear, how families of the afflicted can be affected and more.

I cannot wait to see tonight’s last episode. I hope you tune in as well. If you missed episode 2, click here to view the entire 2-hour show.

The subject was “Family, Friends and Lovers” and the focus was on the impact and importance of the relationships we have, our absolute need for them to be supportive and nurturing, and when things go awry, where and how to get help.

Even though the specific modality of Marriage and Family Therapy itself was not mentioned, the last part “Lovers”, where we follow the couple Monica and Phil through couples counseling, could not have been more appropriate regarding the actual experience that I have gone through so many dozens of times with couples myself. It was incredibly hopeful to me, as a therapist, that so many hundreds of thousands of people who may have outdated or misinformed ideas of what therapy is or looks/feels like were able to be witnesses to an actual, real, accurate experience.

Tune in tonight for part 2, click the link above if you missed part 1, and check back here tomorrow for more feedback, observation and learning.

2010 is upon us and everyone at MFT3 would like to wish you and yours a happy, healthy, safe and peaceful new year (let us know if we can help in any way, too!).

There is an upcoming special on PBS called “This Emotional Life” that looks to be something special, something that we can all learn from. It’s about people and relationships, happiness and depression, and how to make sense out of many things that seem to be so elusive.

Tune in January 4, 5 and 6 and enjoy. MFT3 will be posting responses here as well as on our Twitter feed.

Please contact MFT3 at info@mft3.com or 203-416-6008 to schedule workshops or presentations for your group, congregation, school or business.

We look forward to working with you.

One of the exercises met with particular interest, the Balance Wheel, so I am posting it here now if anyone would like to download it for their own use.

I would like to thank everyone who came out and joined us, and we will let you know of upcoming workshops or presentations as they are scheduled.

Of course, please contact info@mft3.com if you would like to arrange for a custom workshop or presentation for your company or organization.

Registration is required so please call 203-268-8852 if you are interested in attending this free workshop.